Monday, September 21, 2009

Out of the Mouth of Mom, vol 1

Phrases actually uttered by this mom this week in this house:

"Stop doing that, NOW! I don't have time for a broken elbow today."

"For the 4th time today, put the couch cushions and pillows back on the couch."

"Please don't pour your puke bowl over the top of the dirty dishes."

"Please don't leave your puke bowl on the living room floor for the dog to find."

"Stop jumping into the pile of clean laundry"

"Why did you take my freshly washed, very clean sheets off my bed and put them on the dog bed? I don't want to sleep in dog hair."

"Keep your pee in the toilet."

"I really don't want your second grade school picture to be a picture of you with a dent in your forehead. Don't jump off the top bunk."

"Stop jumping on the couch cushions."

"This is my bath, not your bath, please stop playing in it and go find something else to do."

"Yes, the 3rd fish just died. I put the first one in the freezer so we can exchange it. The second one I flushed because it wasn't all the way dead, just mostly. That one... I'm leaving for your dad to scoop out."

"Take off your seat belt now, take off your shoe now, and kill that spider NOW before it comes near me, I don't care if the car is moving."

"Please eat your hot dog before eating that cookie. They are both bad for you. "

"Nice job buddy. You did a great job building that skeleton castle."

Stay tuned for more "Out of the Mouth of Mom" quotes. With three boys the fun never ends.


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